


second chances

by spookykingdomstarlight



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bodhi Rook Lives, Bonding, First Meetings, M/M, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Pre-Relationship, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-08-05 21:53:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16375676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spookykingdomstarlight/pseuds/spookykingdomstarlight
Summary: “Would it be all right if I joined you?” a kind, gentle voice said. It was a voice he’d never heard before, calm and collected, but its sudden appearance made Finn flinch anyway, though he immediately regretted it when he turned to see a man lifting his hands, a warm smile on his face. “I apologize for startling you.” He held out his hand for Finn to grasp. “I’m Bodhi.”





	second chances

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Whenhopediesyoung](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whenhopediesyoung/gifts).



For how cramped the _Millennium Falcon_ was, Finn still managed to feel as though he were alone as he sat near Rose’s bunk. Her breathing was even, steady. The medical droid had stated once they were safely in hyperspace that she would be okay and merely needed rest, but there was the niggling sense of doubt in the back of Finn’s mind, like if he looked away she might die and it would be his fault. That was the kind of thinking that would have gotten him sent to one of the re-education centers on the _Finalizer_. It was too sentimental, too magical. And yet, Finn couldn’t help but believe that he was the reason she’d gotten into this mess. The least he could do was stick around now.

He should have run. The same way he’d run after Tuanul. Swallowing, he looked down at his hands. They still shook though it’d been hours now and he’d have thought himself calm and clear. His only responsibility right now was to be here.

And yet his mind raced. Why hadn’t he run? There was no harm in it. Running had brought him to the Resistance. Running could have saved Rose. Not running certainly wouldn’t have defeated the First Order in one fell swoop as much as he might have wished it could. It was a nice dream, though, and he turned it over in his mind as he sat.

“Would it be all right if I joined you?” a kind, gentle voice said. It was a voice he’d never heard before, calm and collected, but its sudden appearance made Finn flinch anyway, though he immediately regretted it when he turned to see a man lifting his hands, a warm smile on his face. “I apologize for startling you.” He held out his hand for Finn to grasp. “I’m Bodhi.”

The name sounded vaguely familiar, though Finn couldn’t quite place where he might have heard it. Then again, a lot of things seemed familiar. Poe’d said something about Finn being in a medically-induced coma for a bit. All sorts of weird things happened under the circumstances. Maybe he’d heard the name called over the comms, a page sounding throughout the base getting through to his subconscious. “Finn,” he answered, taking Bodhi’s hand. It was dry against Finn’s palm, a little rough, the hands of someone who was not idle. “Nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure’s mine,” Bodhi said, pleasant. He was good looking in an unassuming way, his features striking, a hint of mischief in the twinkle in his eyes. It was the kind of face that made Finn want to get to know its owner better. He gestured at the bench Finn was sitting on. “Do you mind?”

“Oh.” Scooting down, Finn shook his head. “Of course. Sorry. I’m—”

Bodhi’s attention turned to Rose; all he did was nod, but Finn knew that he didn’t have to explain to Bodhi. And when Bodhi looked back at him, there was sympathy in his gaze. But it wasn’t the same as the sympathy others had shown before they’d all dispersed to various parts of the ship in search of somewhere to bunk up. It was similar to the way Rey had looked at him before she’d gone, too, telling him to take care, that she was here if he needed her. It was such that when a lump lodged itself in the back of his throat, he wasn’t embarrassed about it. There was nothing in Bodhi’s gaze that suggested Finn ought to be.

“I should be the one to apologize,” Bodhi answered. “I’m the one intruding after all. But I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself back on D’Qar, so I thought I’d take this chance to talk to you. Or at least sit with you a while. I’ve heard such incredible things about you. This isn’t a good time, I know, but…”

“But when is it ever going to be a good time?” Finn finished, understanding immediately. Finn conveniently ignored the words he spoke prior to that. Finn didn’t feel incredible at the moment. Probably wouldn’t even know what that was like even if he had done anything worthwhile. All he’d done was manage to not get himself killed. “I don’t think there is such a thing in the Resistance.”

Bodhi huffed, amused, his eyebrows raising in agreement. “You’re not wrong. There wasn’t much time during the Rebellion either, so it seems that some things never change.” His hand found the back of his neck, tugging at the strands of hair that had fallen from the bun he wore that might have, before the evacuation, been well-kempt, but now was in a bit of a disarray. Somehow it only made him look more distinguished, like a true Resistance hero. “I suppose there’s some comfort in that.”

“You were with the Rebellion?”

Bodhi’s eyes widened and he didn’t answer right away. “I’m sorry. Yes, I was. I’m Bodhi Rook. I flew with the Rogues for a time. And I was at… well. Let’s just say I’ve been around for a while.”

“Wait.” Finn’s mind turned the name over again, worried it like a smooth, cool stone. The name was familiar. The tidbits of information about his time with the Rebellion. He thought… “Wait. You were at—” Scarif. He was at Scarif. Finn snapped his mouth shut and looked away. He’d learned about Scarif, the First Order’s version of those events anyway. It was a bloodbath all around, the second test of the Emperor’s glorious weapon of peace. The Rebellion had barely escaped. And Bodhi had been there. “I’ve heard of you.”

Bodhi ducked his head. “A lot of people have. But that’s in the past.” Even if that was true, he sounded so somber about it that Finn knew it was not, not for him. Some things just couldn’t be forgotten or forgiven. “What we’re fighting now is… something else.”

His heart fluttered as he realized why else he knew Bodhi. “You defected,” he said, but what he really meant was he ran. He’d run as far away from the Empire as he could get. And he found his way to the Rebellion, too. “You—”

“I didn’t do anything you didn’t do,” Bodhi pointed out. And maybe that was technically true, but it didn’t feel true in the slightest. What Finn did felt like necessity, done out of fear. Bodhi, Bodhi had gone despite it. It was different; he just didn’t know how to articulate it without trampling on history about which he didn’t know enough. Everything he’d thought he knew about the Rebellion, the New Republic, the Old Republic, the Empire? It was wrong. He didn’t want to hurt anybody with that knowledge. Least of all Bodhi, who looked so nice and spoke so softly. Though now he leaned close and teasing the way only people who shared an experience could, added, “Perhaps we can agree that we are both very, very brave for what we did and call it good? Get on with the conversation?”

Finn laughed as the tension broke at Bodhi’s silly pronouncement. “Yeah, I guess we could do that.”

“You have a nice laugh, Finn,” Bodhi said, unprepossessing. Maybe it should have embarrassed him to be so complimented, but it only made him feel warm, happy; he liked that Bodhi thought he had a nice laugh. It made him want to laugh even more just because Bodhi enjoyed it. “And a good smile to go with it. I’m glad you made it out. Though I would have been glad anyway even if neither of those things were true.”

“Oh, I am, too.” Hands on either side of him, he leaned back and tried to stretch his aching muscles. After the day he’d had, he felt like he’d run one of Phasma’s awful gauntlets, the worst sort of physical training in her repertoire. He looked down at his hands. “I wish there was some way—there are so many people stuck in the stormtrooper program. I just wish I could help them.” Maybe this wasn’t the most pleasant of things to talk about, but he wasn’t sure who else would understand. Bodhi might not have been a stormtrooper, but he did defect. He’d probably learned from a young age, too, that the Empire was the pinnacle of achievements. And he hadn’t been able to walk back in there and free the rest of his friends, comrades, fellow officers either.

“We are,” Bodhi insisted. “It doesn’t seem like it now, I’m sure, but it’s true. They’ll get the help they need. Happened after we defeated the Empire, it’ll happen again. I promise.”

There was the sound of boots in the far doorway and a man cleared his throat, presumably the man attached to the boots. “Admiral Rook? Didn’t know you were up here, sir. General Organa was looking for you.” The man tilted his upper body a bit and waved. “Hey, Finn.”

It was Poe. Looking a bit haunted still and worse for wear, but determined, too. Just like everyone in the Resistance was determined. Bodhi turned again to Finn and clapped his hand on Finn’s shoulder, squeezing warmly. “I hope we can sit down and have another chat again soon, Finn,” he said, and though Finn might before have thought that was the last thing he wanted to do—what was the point of talking when there was so much work to be done?—he realized he really would like to have that opportunity with Bodhi.

That and more. Possibly. He felt comfortable around Bodhi in a way he rarely felt around anyone and he was good-looking enough that it made something in Finn’s gut tighten and flutter. “Yeah,” was about the only thing he could think to say, “absolutely. I’d like that. A lot. Come find me any time.”

Bodhi smiled at him one last time and turned toward Poe, who managed somehow to look both cool and awestruck as Bodhi approached. Finn tried not to regret that their conversation had been cut short, but he looked forward to the next one.

He looked forward to that and more.


End file.
